Following me in virtual world, you may think that I hold a compulsive obsession to interact and I am a garrulous guy but you will be disappointed in real world. For in real world, I do talk more but not until I feel comfortable enough that the person opposite isnt going to take whatever I talk as neither trivial nor serious. For I dont sweet coat and also dont consider even trivial things as trivial for I discover heavenly wisdom in it. And hence most of the times as everyone else , may be even a tad bit more than everyone else I keep talking to myself. Just to ensure that it doesnt get to madness levels, I disseminate information and invoke conversations.Judgements and discoveries are made in isolation while analysis and observation are made in discussions in peerless inc.
I am a guy who enjoys movies, and I have been watching them mostly alone ever since my college days. I have had few constant companions whom I am happy to have but I don’t even give them full marks. So forget about mortals who walk in to movies for buying popcorn and relaxing to accompany me. If you are one such you will find me as the last person whom you would go along for a movie. If you had accompanied me in recent days you may feel bad to read this post, but its not about you pals, its about me! I dont intend to forget my self when I set out for leisure , rather I treat it as an occasion to reflect my self and discover more of it. Be it a movie , or a outing , or a eat out I do it mostly alone even when I had choices.
When you got to get alone with another person or a group, you need to sacrifice few of your ways for the wellness of the group. Thats something which looks as a big compromise and hence I refrain. Even with my best of my best groups (I dont have many:(!) I dont feel at home. And I may also trouble them with certain dogmatic needs of mine which will earn their wraith. This is not just about movies or outings. I gave it a deep thought and I found I am more a lonely animal and a miserable social animal. I dont bite you when you are infront of me, neither do my hunts with you. So that cast some doubts on my survival factor in this world.
I have had good friends and have (note the tense!). A much bigger question lurks in my mind, why should one be forced to have a constant companion at all. Will I be able to do it? And more, why should I do it even if I am capable to do it? – Seriously I don’t have answer for it for now.
Perceptions change and I will answer it when mine changes but for now the cost of synchronisation overlies the benefit of the combined work.