Where is this originating?

These thoughts, those words, the compassion, the love for everything I see – where does this come from in the last two hours. At 7:30 it was a tiring day with the intended work still far from completion at work and I was super grumpy. Had a bath and all set to sleep got under the blankets with a book. 

People say me I shouldnt be single/stay alone. I object .. I dont mingle easily not that I am a poor friend who doesnt make a good friend, but I havent found my kinda mid 20 girl/boy  free enough to stay together. When my mom called for the shutdown check she reiterated how grumpy I am to her and when I said that I dont like to be pampered, she challenged that I will be doing the same in few years. Again a paradox!

But the book kept going. It delivered loads of lines which had relevance to the day-2-day life. The happiness hormones found their way again in to my body.If I had thought of sitting and typing 2 hrs ago,it would have not only caused huge stress, but also the words wouldnt have flowed. But now it feels like that these words are on their own and I am just typing them. Is there a thinking in it,yes for sure it should be, but 2hrs ago there would have been too much of thinking which would have restricted the flow of words. If its thinking which causes the words to flow, its the same thinking which halts them. I observe a lot of paradox in me . I am not going to think about solving this maze of paradox.

I love being with people, not all, I detest some at the first sight since I judge and get a prejudice about their disrespect for time. I waste time a lot, so I dont just bother about wasting time not yet, but there are those who make passing times seems tough for no reason. Its this kind of breed, who act with an intent to ease their existence makes it tough for all of us. 

 

Its getting diverted… So I am stopping here. Thats me a paradox in myself! Probably a 2-in -1?

 

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